You can't even start to compare in-camera HDR to what can be done in post processing. The first is just a bunch of algorythms used to put something together automatically while the second uses your own input and gives you the result that YOU want (provided that you have properly done shots). If you really are serious about photography, you will grow out of this function soon enough. All of those in camera gimmicks are just meant to lure in consumers to the low end cameras. The higher in the camera ladder you climb the less gimmicks you get and the more seious the bodies get.
I also suggest you get a D5100 as your first camera. You will be using it as a machine gun in the beginning and wearing out the shutter and the rest of the camera isn't that unlikely. I think that you'd rahter wear out a low end camera than a more expensive one.
Also when you get a lower priced camera, you have more money to spend on proper lenses. The low end lenses are all good an nice, but soon you will be pining for a faster lens.
Also I don't get this patience thing. If you are really interested in getting into photography then it's not patience but delaying it. Also you can never keep up with the new cameras coming out, well you can if you have money growing on trees in the back yard, which you don't seem to have. There will always be a new model with better specs right around the corner and this way you can never buy one ... think what you would be missing out when the next camera comes out in a year, year and a half, etc.
Get a D5100 and a Tamron 17-50 2.8 (the older version without optical stabilisation), enroll in photography courses and start shooting. Rent some longer lenses (e.g a Tamron 70-200 2.8) or a macro lens (e.g Tamron 90 2.8) and see how they suite you. I'd consider this delay a waste of time, as you can learn a lot during that time but you can't learn that without a camera.
Also if you are just getting into DSLR photography, then if you jump in at the deep end it will be a lot harder to learn as the better the camera body is, the more complicated it is to use it.
Before lashing out at people who are trying to help, you should consider that there might be a bit more to photography than just the specs.