I started in exactly the same boat...NOT a previous film user. I started with D40 wondering if I went too light, I didn't, but...I cannot voice D3100 (a very competent camera) vs D7000, it's a big $$ difference but also a LOT of different camera. The D7000 working with those older lenses is definitely worth considering, plus all the other superb advancements, so I will assume you are going D7000.
I got the two kit lenses with my D40 (18-55 and 55-200). My next was 35mm 1.8 DX for $200 (low light and sharpness). Next was 12-24mm DX wide angle (wide angle is the major one where you really need to stay DX to get the effect...a wide FX lens would be wasting your money, so go 10-24 or 12-24 on this one for landscapes and getting it "all in").
I then upgraded to the D90 and bought older lenses (50mm 1.8D and 105 AF-D Micro-Nikkor, i.e. the macro close-up lens). The macro is a luxury, but it's also f/2.8. The 50mm is awesome as it focuses IMO much faster than the 35mm 1.8 DX, so much that I rarely use the latter anymore.
I like my lineup, but now want to upgrade my 55-200 to an f/2.8 80-200 or the big gun 70-200. I suppose the new 55-300 should be okay, but I would try limiting my f/5.6 lens investments as much as possible. For most uses they are okay, but you will soon long for better (this is not to sound all snobby). So I would not invest big bucks in, say, the 18-200 DX...buy what you need and you definitely need telephoto and the one you suggest is likely the only that fits either budget (D3100 or D7000).
Last thing...that 50mm lens means you are in fact shooting 75mm at the widest and that will force you to buy something wider...yeah you can use your legs to zoom out, but you need that 35mm or shorter range, seriously. Good luck, exciting time to jump in with the new cameras!
(Oh, don't forget the flash sooner than later...you'll never use your pop-up again!)
